When you believe...

Every little child dreams about being something or being someone. The beauty of childhood is having that innocence that makes you believe in things that most likely won't come true. It easy putting your faith and trust into something because as kids, we were so naive to this world and the many things that corrupt it. 

Life doesn't always go as planned, but you have to believe in something to get you through. You have to put your faith into a power or a being so that you can live your life with a purpose. I believe in God, others of you out there may believe in some other power, and I respect all who put meaning into their lives. It's the thing that will carry us past our struggles and challenges. 

God has been my constant, my never ending security blanket that I know will always be there. I know I've had my share of being that "lukewarm" water that nobody wants to be, because He waits and waits while I try and do, making me believe that I am happy in life, when true happiness only happens when God is the center. 

I want to live my life with a purpose. I want to place my belief in God, my faith, so that I may never walk through my struggles alone. He knows my strengths and also my deepest weaknesses. He allows me to be myself, while trying to transform me so that I may grow closer to Him and share who I am with others.

Life is never a clear path, and we all know how difficult it may be. But God continues to say "believe in me and give me your life and I will make things straight". I love knowing that I have a God who will never fail me. When I believe...anything is possible. Sometimes it's best to think like a child...

12/5

12/5 needs to motivate me. 

A shoe for every 5lbs needs to motivate me. 

This plateau is self inflicted...no loss, slight gain = major failure. 

I'm ready to take it down...slowly but surely. 

185...I'm coming for you! 

TO THE GYM I GO!

5 fitness goals (By December 2013).

1. Be under 160lbs - (Sub-goal: be less than 8% body fat)

2. Run a 5k & a half marathon - (Sub-goal: run a mile in under 8 minutes)

3. Bench 225lbs - (Sub-goal: 100 pushups in a row)

4. 100 situps & 10 pullups

5. Finish both Insanity & P90x (from beginning to end)

** In two and a half years, my goal is to check all these off **

OS moment.

Woke up this morning, knowing I'd be scared to step on this scale, (being that it's actually been awhile since I've even stepped on it) and totally had an "OS" (oh sh!t) moment. 

Getting back up to 200lbs is somewhere I don't even wanna touch. Something I am NEVER wanting to ever do in my life, and shall I say I was very close. I've probably been the most unhealthy eater the past 2 or 3 weeks, which as you all may know, a lot can be gained in that amount of time. I step on the scale and it read: 196.4.

OH SH!T! 

Definitely not a good feeling. I've been going to the gym, but eating equally as bad and definitely large portions. I deserved the number on the scale and definitely needed to see that in order to change for real. All this talk about "doing it" "now or never" "let's do this", well...w/out seeing something like this and having an OS moment, the urgency just won't be there. 

And after having this moment. It's definitely there. I'm disappointed in myself for letting myself gained close to 10 pounds back, but there's nothing I can do about it. I've been my worst fear and that is to revert in to my old style of living, and let me tell you this right now...THIS IS IT. I'm not letting myself get back to anywhere close to 200. I'm heavy as it is right now, and I'm gonna stop being a dumb@ss and get HEALTHY! 

Time to be BORING and do it and do it the right way.