It takes giving up something to get something.

Dear World, 

I know many don't know I even have a blogspot, but I'm just gonna vent. 

This blog has little to do about losing weight, but just LIFE. 

I'm a musician at heart, someone who loves music as a whole, everything from listening to it, to playing it myself, to the art of a CD cover, to music videos...whatever it is, I've been passionate about it someway or another. 

During the past couple years in nursing school, I've given it up to get something else, and that something (which happens to mean the world to me) is my nursing degree. I've grown to love the medical field. Grown to love the thought of helping others get better, not only physically, but mentally and spiritually. Nursing is a tough job, and a job that not everyone can do. At first, i couldn't imagine myself doing it for years, but now, i can't imagine myself not doing it at all. 

Over the course of those years in school, I've kept putting my passion and first love (music) aside. Countless times i'd turn down show opportunities because of my determination to succeed in school. Sometimes i would be so tempted to just slip a little bit in school, just to get my name out there and to do what i love to do...perform. 

Its hard for me to admit this right at this very second, but I've lost almost all my passion for the music. It's hard to believe that a person who held music so close to their heart, at the moment wishes it never consumed me. I question my talent right now if I've been fooling myself trying to get myself and my songs noticed. 

Sigh. only time will tell whether this love for music will ever be the same. 

So for now, I'm letting go of the name "RuSouL". Letting go of something familiar, to obtain something I've been working on for ever. 

I hope one day i'll be laughing at this blog and say, why did I ever want to quit music. BUT for right now, this is how I feel. 

Music, you've been a huge part of my life, But I'm letting you go. 

Not forever. But until I can look at you the same and say I LOVE YOU once again. 

So, thank you music for always being there. I know you'll always be there. 

Goodbye. 

It really takes giving up something to get something. 

&& hopefully that something else, is as good as you've treated me. 

much love & hope. 

Russy