The feeling of getting fat.

Is a horrible feeling. 

It makes me cringe. 
Yet, I know that's what's happening when I eat bad. But I still somehow do it. 

Although I haven't gone back up to 230, I'm near there. Hovering around 200lbs is a shame.
I've been so good until about a month and a half ago, and the weight is slowly creeping up on me. 

I won't let it happen, I just can't.
A couple years ago, I stopped caring. I thought well, I've been the fat guy...might as well be the fat guy. 

But the fact that I hated going out and one of the reasons I stopped playing music, is what makes me want to change.

The feeling of people knowing you're gaining weight & not saying anything gets to me.

I'm still at the phase where it's catch(able) and not too late to change.
Nobody likes to be in the"full blown" stage, where they feel like it's impossible to turn back. 

I'm at the place where I few tweaks here and there and I'll be back on my way to being where I want to me. 

Everything is a mental game with me. Psyching myself out and making me believe and follow my routine. 

I vow that 26 will be a year that changes my life. 

26 will be a year I look back and say, I managed to stop all the talk and do the walk. 

It's where dreams become reality. To finally be in the 150-60's.
I want to be the guy that everyone says "How did you do it?" "tell me your secret" 

And I'll I'm going to say is, hard work, dedication, commitment and a lot of luck being healthy. 

Whatever it is that is stopping me, won't stop me any more. 

This is my time.
This is me going back to being serious about it. 

This is me achieving my goals. No questions asked.