Built to do this.

I've always been built on motivation.

At the beginning of this journey, it was a friendly competition w/ my friend Jordz and shall I say that I brought it every single day and was driven. Every body around me could see it. I don't joke around when something is on the line. 

I'm still about living healthy and dropping weight, but somewhere along the way, I lost the extreme motivation. I feel like I'm just running through the motions. Which is great because I'm living a healthy lifestyle. But am I maximizing my potential? No.

The feeling of satisfaction is there, and I don't want to get content. April, like I said in the past, is a make or break it type of month for me. It's one of those months where I feel like I can either regress, or make leaps and bounds to getting where I want to get. 

In the past, I made what people said to more or what people did to me my motivation to get in shape and be healthy. I was driven because I wanted to prove those around me that I was worth something. Like my Jr. High PE coach who told me "You will never make the team because you're fat" or to ask me questions like "What does your family feed you?" or the time when the donut guy at the donut shop "You're FAT now!" or when I went to 24hr fitness for my first time and saw someone I knew...He was like "did you get married or something? Cause you got hella fat!" 

C'mon now, who isn't driven by that type of motivation. Who doesn't get heated about the things people say. Or when I think about my childhood and so many people would make fun of me. Those are the things that drive me. Something needs to drive me now, and maybe it will be those same people. I hated feeling like that, and I know I still have a long way to go, but I need to build up that anger (healthy anger that is) inside of me and generate that to make me wanna work out more and twice as hard.

The eating so far is coming easy. I know I haven't cut out the carbs yet, but am sticking to the multigrains and wheats and browns. BUT I need to workout and I need to take that energy/motivation and just bring it. I'm 6 days in the month and have only had 2 workouts. 4 days of laziness. 

I want to prove not only to those around me, but to myself that I am built for this. I am built to succeed. Built to change and change big. I am ready....I have 10 pounds to lose in 25 days. It's going to be hard, but if that's not motivating, I don't know what's going to motivate me.

Let's go. 

BST.TLF. 

Russy