Addicted to the weighing scale...

I guess when you're on a mission to lose a certain amount of weight, you're constantly stepping on the scale so you can reap the results of what you're working hard for. That's been the story of my life the past 2 weeks. I step on the scale multiple times a day, hoping that I've lost more weight. It's kind of like a guilty pleasure, or is more of an obsession? The scale can either be your best friend or your worst enemy!

When I was younger, I absolutely HATED stepping on the scale. Whenever I went to the doctors office as a kid because I was sick, I would try not to eat purposefully, because I was pretty ashamed at how heavy I weighed. When most of my friends in grade school were like 100 pounds or less, I was up close to the 200. I remember always being between 195-199. I never hit that 200 mark as a kid, probably until after the 6th grade. Then I probably capped out at 215-220 during my Jr. High and High school days. Then senior year came around, and I went from around 215, all the way to about 165 in a matter of months. I worked hard. Diet. Exercise. and more.

A couple years ago, I weight in over 230. The heaviest I have ever been in my life. I looked in the mirror and wonder whether or not I was going to be one of those extremely FAT people on TV. I got scared and started to work out. I still hated stepping on the scale, but had to set bench marks to reach in order to get down to a healthier weight. I've been fluctuating around 207 to 220+ the past year and when I got into my accident, since I wasn't eating at all, I went all the way down to 197. That was the first time out of the 200 in a while.

I've been working so hard the past month, and I'm losing weight, but not as fast as I'd like. I always have to remind myself that "what took time to put on, will take even longer to take off". The thing is take it off, but keep it off. Which is why I like to step on the scale so much. I like seeing the numbers go down, because all that hard work is paying dividends.

I have to do it how I did it before. I never stepped on the scale. I just worked hard. Kept working hard and let the mirror do all the talking. I'll know if I'm truly losing weight when the pants start fitting a lot more loose, and when I need another size shirt because those are starting to fall off as well. I've hid the scale for the next 2 weeks, and am planning on working harder and harder to achieve my goals. The scale is just a scale, but how I feel about my body and how I look are more important then the number that pops up.

This again, is all new to me again. I grow so engulfed with the little and big things about losing weight. Such as what to eat, when to eat it. What to work out, how hard to work at it. Those are the certain things that come w/ those who truly want it. And I really want it. I want to be healthy for my future. For the family I'm going to have, for the job that I'm going to get. As a nurse, I need to show that we live the way we preach to our patients, and that being healthy is a great feeling.

So, goodbye scale. At least for the next couple weeks. Push hard. Work smart. and things will start to fall into place.